I had never heard of this concept before, but Jeremy's friend, Sarah (you can find her blog in my "Recommended Blogs" section), introduced me, and I'm hooked!
Since she and her boyfriend are both "perfectionists" by her admittance, she shared with me the idea they came up with called "The Relationship Handbook" (that's my name for it, anyways!).
This is a great tool for not only courting (because I don't believe in our society's norm to date), but married folks too.
See, in the stage I'm in where you are just getting to know someone this binder helps you to remember all those little things about the other person. For example, their love language, their strengths, habits, likes and dislikes.
The idea can in some ways be rooted to Fireproof, where Caleb is given the assignment to study his wife as if he were still courting her.
And, this binder really helps us remember all those little details that sometimes get swept away with responsibility and the chaos of life.
It can include anything you'd like. I'm just starting on Jeremy and I's and here's some of the things I have (in no particular order):
1)Love Language
2)Apology Language
3)Conflict Resolution (still to be discussed and finalized, a "protocol" to follow when conflict arises between the two of you)
4)All About Jeremy (include fun facts and things you need to remember)
5)Date Ideas (yes, even though we're 10 hours apart, I still made this a priority, it's not always going to be this way!)
6)His Day (ideas/things he'd like to do on days that are designated for me to learn about him, and how to better serve him).
7)Gift Ideas
8)Surprise Ideas
9)Ways to Respect Him
10)Communication Practice (I put this behind conflict resolution, while he's more bold and out front about things, I'm reserved, so this was important for me to figure out ways to improve in this area.).
Like I said, it's still a work in progress, and I'm currently at work, so I can't take pictures of it yet. I have to decorate it, after all. :)
Hope this helps those of you who've been together a short time, and those of you who are married and growing old together!
And again, a HUGE thank you to Sarah for sharing this idea with me! It helps to shape your relationship into the BEST it can be!
Yaaay! I'm so glad you're starting a relationship binder for yourself and Jeremy, Jess...or as you call it, "The Relationship Handbook.":) I look forward to seeing it one day, complete with the decorations you mentioned...And I look forward to seeing the unique categories you come up with so I can steal them for my own relationship binder with Michael.;) Have fun with the process, Jess.:)
ReplyDeleteAs a sidenote- I think Michael deserves even more credit in your blog than me for the binder. I'm pretty sure it was actually his idea in fact...though we kind of get mixed up quite a bit about who originated what.:) That's what happens when you feel as if you're sharing a brain lol.
ReplyDeleteI didn't want to mention his name withot his permission. But, thank you for your sweet words of encouragement, can't wait for our phone date!
DeleteThat is completely understandable, Jess.:) Thank you for the thought of protecting Michael's privacy...though I'm pretty sure Michael himself doesn't really care about his privacy half the time lol! I just felt bad about having a mention without him. He's done a lot himself and deserves recognition. And I'll say it again, I'm totally looking forward to seeing this binder of yours and comparing notes when you're over here. Should be some fun times!!!
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